The Simulacrum

"I'll have 'Boeuf Bourguignon' and a serving of… um… do you pronounce it 'Tomates Farcies'?"

"A 'Hachis Parmentier' for me."

"I'll go with a 'Poulet Basquaise' and 'Cheese Soufflé'. What about you?"

I eyed the scarred man at the other end of the table, and uttered, "Beef with fries."

"'Steak-frites'," Judy 'translated' that into menu terms, and the waitress standing at our left diligently jotted it down into her tiny little blue notepad.

Everyone made their orders, and once she finally left, I levelled yet another deadpan stare at the man in the striped suit. It didn't escape him, and he responded with a rather nonchalant smirk. Despite both of us agreeing to 'get down to business', we couldn't just start talking about the Abyss while the waitress was still hovering around us, and because the whole bloody menu was written in French, it took more time to figure out our dishes than was strictly necessary.

Why did we pick a restaurant as our meeting place again? I mean, I can't exactly cast the first stone; back when I recruited the Research Society members through Fred, we also met up in a restaurant. However, that made sense. I couldn't take them to the base, and my living room would've been way too crowded if we tried to squeeze all of them inside, so I went with the safe option, and the offer of free food unironically convinced a bunch of the kooky mad science nerds to attend the meeting.

In contrast, meeting here felt like a mistake in retrospect, as there were just too many distractions in play. Such as trying to figure out what the heck a 'Bouillabaisse' was, and how it differed from a 'Soupe de Poissons', without using a dictionary.

All of that was behind us though, so it was time to focus on the actual point of this meeting, a sentiment everyone shared around the table.

"While I agreed that we should omit the pleasantries, I think we should at least properly introduce ourselves first," the man in front of me spoke up first and then waited for my response.

"Sure, let's get it out of the way," I agreed and started right away. "I think I don't need to introduce myself, but just to be thorough: Leonard S. Dunning, King of Kings, The Second True Archon, et cetera." Next, I vaguely gestured in Snowy's direction. "You seem to have met my sister already, and as for the others…"

"Judy Sennoma and Tajana Sukkal, if I'm not mistaken." He used my momentary hesitation over whom to introduce first to interject with a self-satisfied glint in his eye. "I believe at this point there's scarcely anyone in the so-called World of Mystics who wouldn't recognize your fiancée. As for the other lady…" He gazed at Tajana, and for once the spymaster was properly holding her ground and met his stare without flinching or any embarrassing shenanigans. "To think I would see you in the company of House Inanna's missing spymaster… Should I consider her presence a political statement, or merely a gesture showing your long reach?"

"Neither. She's here as my sister's subordinate."

"Oh? How curious." He picked up a wine glass and took a sip. It was most likely to buy him some time to think, and his expression remained inscrutable throughout the whole process. "Now, I believe it's our turn to introduce ourselves. I'm Tracas Birtum Ashur of House Ashur. These two are my… qualified witnesses. From my House. Please pay them little heed."

"As protocol dictates," Tajana spoke up out of the blue, sounding unusually dignified for a moment. Only just that long, because she noticed the sideways glance I was giving her and she hurriedly added. "It's standard practice to have witnesses during negotiations between Noble Houses. It's why Lady Sennoma and I are here as well."

She phrased that as a statement, but by the end of it she sounded so unsure that it might as well have been a question. To be fair though, I was of two minds about this whole topic. On one hand, this situation was just awkward and a bit forced, so I wanted to get it over with as soon as possible. On the other hand, this was related to (what I presumed to be) our 'main plot' that future-me-as-Bel was arranging in the background, so I didn't want to rush it either.

Caught between these two conflicting urges, I was so late to respond that Snowy of all people decided to pick up my slack.

"Correct me if I'm wrong, but Mister Tracas is the younger brother of the head of House Ashur."

"The late head," he corrected him with just a hint of a frown. "My brother died at the hands of the self-proclaimed Herald of the Emperor."

He was clearly looking for a reaction, but my Abyssal sister simply gave him a shallow nod of acknowledgement and continued on.

"My condolences. Nevertheless, considering the hardships that befell on House Ashur, I find it curious that you not only managed to come to Critias, but to bring 'qualified witnesses' from your ruined House along with you."

The man raised an intrigued brow at that, followed by a low chuckle.

"Oh? The young lady's is unexpectedly mistrustful, isn't she? Maybe I shouldn't be surprised; children without their parents need to grow up fast, after all."

That was an odd remark, and it made Tajana glare at the man, but Snowy took it in stride.

"This isn't about trust, but common courtesy. You're the one in need of assistance, so you shouldn't play coy. My brother has little patience for people who play dumb."

"Such a sharp tongue for someone so young," the man chuckled and glanced at the two people at his side. "Very well. If you insist, I'll introduce my witnesses." He raised a hand and presented the burly man on his right first. "This is Nuage Anshar, a loyal retainer of House Ashur." The man let out a soft grunt in acknowledgement, and after that, Tracas did the same with the woman. "And she's Terre Kishar, a dear family friend and confidante of mine."

The lady inclined her head with a demure smile, not saying a single word. The introductions were followed by a long stretch of silence, broken by the scarred man impatiently clearing his throat.

"So, can we 'talk business' now, as originally planned?"

"Depends," I responded flatly and glanced at my dear assistant. "Dormouse?"

"The man looks generic, so I can't say anything about him. He might really be just a retainer," Judy responded promptly and stared at the woman sitting opposite her. "As for her, I'm surprised she's using her real name in this situation."

"Excuse me?" the placeholder-looking woman tried to interject, but Judy continued unabated.

"Or rather, half of her real name. She's Corbeau Kishar from House Nergal, obviously." She paused and tapped her finger on her own cheek. "Mole under the left eye. It narrowed down the list of suspects by a lot, even without the name."

The lady tried to pretend that she had no idea what was going on, but then the scarred man in the middle let out a shallow groan and told her, "Just own up to it, don't make it worse."

"… Fine." This was the first time she spoke in a natural tone, and just like with Tracas, she had a fairly thick Italian accent. She then promptly undid her hair bun and let her locks fall to her shoulder before putting on a pair of thick-rimmed glasses and exhaling a long sigh. "So, what now? Can we finally start negotiating, or what?"

She was surprisingly abrasive, in stark contrast to her previous vacant act and… I just realized, but did she just disguise herself as a placeholder? No, wait. That probably wasn't literally the case. She most likely just tried to look and behave innocuously to blend into the background, but still, that was just uncanny.

"Ah! It's you!" our alleged Abyssal spymaster exclaimed without warning, pointing at the unmasked woman with eyes wide open.

"You two know each other?"

"Not personally, no, but…" Her words soon trailed into a mumbled, "I should've recognized her right away…"

"Yes, you should've," the woman grumbled and took a cigarette out of her handbag, though she didn't light it. "Bite me, I didn't in a million years expect to see you here! I thought you'd see right through my disguise, but I guess the Hound of Inanna isn't what she's cranked up to be, huh?"

"Ladies. Please." Tracas raised his voice to interrupt the two and turned a pair of cold eyes to me. "Well played. You've caught us red-handed. Now what?"

That was a good question, but before anything else, I directed an appreciative smirk at my dear assistant, who accepted it with her usual deadpan expression tinted by just a hint of pride. Did she seriously memorize the names and descriptions of all known Abyssals, I wondered. It was certainly a possibility, but I would have to ask her later, because we had bigger fish to fry.

"As my sister just told you, I have little patience for people wasting my time with idiotic ploys, and it's already running low after this pointless stunt of yours." I levelled a cutting glare at him, to make sure the message was properly conveyed, and concluded my bit with a slightly growly, "Stop wasting my time and get to the point."

The man in the striped suit was clearly miffed by my attitude, but since they were caught, we had the initiative on our side. More so than in the beginning; after all, they were the ones who were seeking me out, so that already put them on the back foot. I was curious how they would try to salvage this situation, and… honestly, after the way the woman by his side turned out to be a non-placeholder, I couldn't help but have even more reservations about the other man at the table, and whether he'd also turn out to be more than met the eye.

"Fine. Let's cut to the chase," Tracas responded dourly and placed his hands onto the table. "We require your assistance."

"You want us to provide you with asylum," Tajana interjected, and the woman on the other side let out a derisive scoff.

I eyed her for a second or two, and when she awkwardly averted her gaze, I turned back to the scarred man.

"I presume that outburst meant it's not the case."

"Yes. You're as perceptive as rumored." Was that sarcasm, or just run-of-the-mill brown-nosing, I wondered. "Our request for asylum wasn't… entirely sincere."

"That's two," I pointed out, making him stop in his tracks and blink at me. "That's the second time you tried to deceive me. Remind me, why am I supposed to help you again?"

"Technically speaking, it was to deceive the public," Corbeau… or was it Terre? The woman in the dress. Her fingers were still playing with the unlit cigarette between her fingers, like a budget femme fatale, and she tried her best to sound self-assured even under my gaze. "We needed a plausible cover story to contact you, and since House Ashur was already in a…" She glanced at the man sitting at her side and her lips bent into an inscrutable smile. "Let's call it 'business arrangement' with the Celestials, Tracas reaching out to you would sound entirely reasonable for those already familiar with the circumstances. Especially considering his House's dire situation."

While I was listening to her, I periodically peeked at the burly 'retainer' on the other side of the Ashur noble, but his expression remained entirely static. That was suspicious, even for a placeholder, so I made sure to keep keeping an eye on him.

Meanwhile, Tracas let out a soft groan.

"That is, indeed, the gist of the situation, but you didn't need to put it so bluntly."

"There's no point pussyfooting around the topic, is there?" she responded without a hint of shame.

Seeing their interactions, it was clear that while she wasn't part of a Noble House herself, she was treated as an equal, if not outright in a superior position. It meant that Tajana's conjecture that House Ashur was currently being supported by House Nergal was most likely on the money.

"True," he answered through gritted teeth and faced me again. "Let me be frank: we need you to deal with the current family head of House Ashur."

"Deal with?" Snowy repeated after him, and he nodded without a shred of hesitation.

"My nephew, the de jure head of the House after the unfortunate passing of my brother, is currently held hostage by Noir Irdu Inanna, deep within the prison facility known as the Chasm of Desolation. I believe you're familiar with it."

The name didn't immediately ring a bell, but then Judy whispered, "It's where Brang was held after the incident at the school."

"Huh? You mean, that medieval underground dungeon?"

"One and the same," the woman at the other side of the table quipped with the still unlit cigarette in her mouth. Was she doing it out of habit, or did she really want to have a smoke but was unable to do so because of the restaurant's policy? It didn't really matter, but it bothered me.

"So b—" Snowy started, and then hastily cleared her throat and tried again. "So Noir imprisoned him in the Chasm of Desolation? Why would he do that?"

"Because he wanted to marry Milady to him," Tajana pointed out. Of course, we already knew that, but it didn't stop her from continuing with, "He was planning to seize all of House Assur's assets that way."

"I know that he was planning to do that, but it shouldn't matter now that he declared himself the Herald of the Emperor," Snowy argued back and then turned to the Ashur envoy. "Why would Noir keep him alive all this time?"

"It's to stop me from becoming the head of House Ashur," Tracas stated bitterly and tapped his finger on the table. "Our house still has many assets, both in the Abyss and on Critias, which could be used for the war effort, but while the young head remains his hostage, we can't utilize them."

"I understand your problem now, but what do you expect me to do?"

"The same thing you've already done in the past," Tracas responded calmly. "You had already infiltrated the Inanna's prison once and brought an entire squad of Fauns to Critias under the Inannas' noise, didn't you? We ask you to do the same again."

"Hold your horses," I cut it with a hand raised, and couldn't help but let my skepticism show in my voice. "You want me to rescue your nephew."

"Or kill him," the man responded as naturally as if we were discussing the weather. "It should be considerably easier than smuggling him out of the Abyss, but I leave the choice up to your discretion."

"Either way, it would resolve the inheritance stalemate," the woman with the cigarette tacked on, sounding almost disinterested.

"… Are you serious?" They looked rather surprised by my question, so I clarified, "Let's put the whole fratricide request aside, and look at this objectively. Do you remember all of those titles I rattled off at the beginning of this meeting?" I pointed at my face for emphasis. "You expect me to personally go to the Abyss?"

"Yes. You've done it already for a much lesser cause," the woman pointed out, earning her a glare.

"That was then, and this is now. Your request is ludicrous."

This made no sense neither in a Watsonian nor a Doylist perspective. Sure, I could absolutely infiltrate the Abyss and rescue this guy's nephew in an afternoon, but they didn't know that. While the world at large was now aware of my ability to teleport, nobody knew I could Phase into the Abyss as well, and even if they were, why would they even think requesting this was a good idea? I was the head of multiple supernatural organizations, for crying out loud! That's like some foreign nation asking the US for help, and expecting the president to personally go there and shoot up the place. It was asinine.

They shouldn't be this dumb (or desperate), so what other option was there? Narrative influence? That was me, and I sure as hell didn't expect something like this to come up, either consciously or subconsciously, so… maybe it was future-me's doing? But then why wasn't any of this mentioned in the notebook he handed over to me?

Did he not know about this? That's impossible, so… maybe he purposefully withheld the information, because it would've been a 'spoiler'? Yeah, that was probably the most logical explanation, but did that mean he arranged this? Or was this another one of those semi-hard-coded developments in the Simulacrum's original scenario that resurfaced in a fragmented state?

I mean, from a Doylist perspective, it made some sense. Our finale was being set up as a Bel plus Crowy versus Leonard and Co. confrontation, but if it took place on Critias, they would be outnumbered and outgunned by all the Draconians, arch-mages, and Celestials on the island. It made sense to change things up by pulling me into the Abyss and…

Oh, wait. Maybe that was the point. To 'take me off the game board', so to speak, and allow other dramatic developments to happen on Critias without my interference, which would imply that there should be something brewing here as well, probably to keep Josh and Angie occupied, and… Ugh. How come I had a future version of myself running amok these days, and I was somehow still left in the dark about how things were about to develop? Such a pain in the neck.

Mulling over all of these problems took me some time, and our Abyssal envoys were getting more impatient by the second. Luckily, Snowy rose to the occasion to keep them occupied.

"You're demanding something outrageous without a modicum of shame," she stated sternly, glaring at the trio one by one. "Why would my brother do this for you? What can you offer in return?"

"If it's money you're after…" Tracas started, but Judy cut him off.

"We don't need money."

"Then we can hand over some of House Ashur's assets," the cigarette-woman argued, but it only made my dear assistant shake her head and gesture at me.

"The Chief effectively owns the entirety of Elysium." That was a bit of an overstatement, but this wasn't the time to correct her. "Why would he do your bidding for land in the Abyss of all places?"

"Then…" Her eyes locked onto Snowy and she hastily declared. "If you do this, both House Ashur and House Nergal will support you to claim rulership over House Inanna!"

My sister blinked at her, and her expression gradually morphed into a mixture of outrage and disgust.

"I don't care for the position, but even if I did and I wished to contest Noir's authority, your approval is meaningless to me. I'm Neige Liliam Inanna-Dunning, and I don't need your support."

"Wait. Please, calm down." The man in the striped suit raised his hands in surrender. "We're losing track of the goal of this meeting. Let's take a step back and—"

"We'll give you anything," a new voice entered the fray, startling the other two Abyssals and making it hard for me not to smirk, because I totally called it.

The other 'witness' at the table was staring at me, and he underwent some peculiar changes while I wasn't looking. His entire body was surrounded by a swirling dark-red haze, and based on everyone else's lack of reaction, one that only I could see. Furthermore, the sclera of his eyes turned pitch black, while his irises were glowing with a soft orange light, the colour hot iron.

"So you finally decided to speak up," I responded calmly, and while I was only pretending to know what was happening, the man accepted my words at face value and inclined his head towards me.

"Please excuse my discourtesy, but I really was planning to only serve as a witness today." While speaking, he undid his shirt's top button and tugged at his collar, releasing even more of the hazy red mist. "I'm Fidèle Basmu Shamash."

"W-What is the head of House Shamash doing here?" Tajana blurted out, and the man lightly shrugged while undoing the buttons on his sleeves.

"Acting as a witness, naturally. I wasn't planning to reveal my presence on Critias just yet, but my companions' inability to read the room forced me to surface." Once he finished loosening his clothes, he let out a long breath and locked eyes with me. "I'll be direct with you, Polemos of Elysium: Bel of the Abyss and his Herald is an existential threat to us all. We must set aside our differences and face him together… is what I'd like to say, but I'm too old to believe that rousing speeches and the good of all are enough incentives for someone to involve themselves in someone else's war. We're also the ones making a request, so if anything, it's only reasonable that you should be setting the conditions. So long as it's within reason, we'll definitely comply."

"I still find this whole conversation ludicrous," I pointed out the moment I could interject, but after a beat, I softened it into a slightly more reasonable, "However, you do make a good point about Bel being a problem we all have to deal with together, so… I'll think about it."

"Fair enough," he responded stoically, and I could see the light in his eyes flicker for a moment. "I retreat for now, before my presence here could garner any attention. Let us talk again under less… circuitous circumstances. I hope for a positive response by then."

With that, the haze surrounding the man suddenly surged downwards and disappeared under the table, leaving him momentarily confused. As for the head of House Shamash, he disappeared as suddenly as he came, only leaving a vague, snaking trail of red haze behind in his wake. I had many questions about what just happened, but before that, there was something else I had to say.

"Three," I uttered blandly, raising the matching number of fingers towards the scarred man in front of me. "That's how many times you tried to deceive me just today. You people couldn't deny your Celestial ancestry if you tried…"